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(no subject) [Mar. 14th, 2015|05:50 pm]
The bruises tell a story and the scars they track the trends
It’s 2:30 in the morning and I’ve lost about half my friends
Try to trace what I kept chasing dozen shots and chasers too
The three people who love me well I don’t think they’d approve
I’ve been away for months, with temptations given never paid for one
I should be pacing em
Blank and numb when I’m tipping my wrist
So forgiveness that’s what I’m banking on
Photos I don’t remember, moments I can’t recall
Seems like it’s last September, but it’s already next fall
Drift in and out of the scene of the bar, or the van, or the room
What I mean is I’m starving for truth getting harder to see
Any logic in making a martyr of me
Giving it all my all but all of the sudden I’m starting to bawl
Barfing the contents of my heart out in a bathroom stall
Nobody loves me, nobody calling my name at night
Nobody trusts me, not dialing the cops when I say I might
And I’m likely somewhat skewed to the view
From the back of a DJ booth, in the back of a club in the back of my mind
This is the life I choose

I’m trying to get by, I’m trying to give up, I’m trying to get high, dude
I’m trying to let up, I’m trying to get buzzed, I’m trying to go by you
I’m trying to get paid, I’m trying to lose weight, I’m trying to get fucked up
Just wanted to say, I’m running real late, so don’t you wait up
So don’t you wait up for me

I know this won’t work out, I know that my future’s fucked
Nothing I’m sure about, except for my stupid luck
Guess it’ll work for now, but baby I’m losing blood
And I’ll be the first to shout, I haven’t been true enough
On the counter got a PBR, brain hit by a meteor
My whole life needs CPR, never really gets easier
Commitments yeah I tossed a few, ah in one of those moods
Both eyes on the good stuff, want a pretty good buzz so take one of those too
Low down real depressed
Contemplate sending texts to a guy who I don’t even like
But this one time we had sex
So don’t go telling me I’m a shit show cause I already know that
Don’t say I should slow down tell me to think twice, shit when I already hold back
All the flak I get, I deserve like half of it
Cut until it bleeds, til I’m begging on my knees, so you call me a masochist
Well I call that day to day, usual type business
Feeling lost and getting found, it’s not so different
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<3 [Mar. 1st, 2015|02:14 pm]
If you're on a first date and it's going real bad
If your life is wreck and you're feeling real sad
Come kick it with me, come kick it with me
If you're feeling like a chump only got six bucks in your wallet
Never ballin can't get your dick sucked
Come kick it with me, come kick it with me
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(no subject) [Feb. 14th, 2015|01:56 pm]
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(no subject) [Oct. 14th, 2013|07:47 pm]
Ooo Ahh Blast off This ship is taking off
And it aint coming back watch as I fade to black
Oh no going in can't come back my friend
This is my final call follow in the magic ball
Yes sir one more please trip around the galaxies
Can I get some greenie beans lift off now i see
X-ray vision now cat power puppy chow
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(no subject) [Sep. 24th, 2011|03:58 pm]
Lessee. Been a bit stressed lately and unfortunately letting it affect my attitude. I also think it is the weather change. The sun sets at like 730 these days and it has been cold , totally autumn feeling officially. Today it was pretty hot and sunny , about 23 degrees! But basically it has been rainy and muggy and I have been in an odd feel-like-doing-shit-al type mood.
Longboarded yesterday, made some epic "sauce n cake" - caramel with apple chunks. I almost like it better than the chocolate one.
Jailbroke my iPod and been playing Zombieville USA. And I gOt shaweet layouts and backgrounds and apps. Unfortunately my auxillAry jack input thing keeps cutting out so I'm going to have to restore t and exchange it again. About the fifth time that's happened.
Got a bladder infection a couple days ago and I think the antibiotics made me feel funky.
We found a motherfucking deep fryer at value village; the same one steev used to have ages ago. This deepfryer seemed pretty much brand new. Not bad for 20 bucks.
I wantto go Longboard in some parkades again. Steev lost the only key to my Volkswagen so he had to take one of my locks apArt and we shall take to the locksmith on Monday.
I'm starting cooking classes October 5th. Every Wednesday 630pm to 9 pm for like 5 weeks. The course was 585 bux; my union has a bbursary and I'm getting $400 of that paid for, so I only gotta pay for 185. Good thing is that it falls on my day off so it is perfect and won't interfere with my work. On the bright side I am getting more comfortable with cooking. One of the guys at the recovery house that I work at said that the roast that I made was the best one he's had in like 10 years.
My good friend Jesz visited Vancouver from Regina and I got to hang out with her for a night. Me her Arlene James and she got to meet steev which I am stoked about because they got along.
Jesz is moving to Vancouver and she's already got an apartment she's renting with the help of a friend of hers who went and looked at it for her before she came to van. We had a gathering at her place and drank lots of tea.
So on September 27 I am flying to Regina and I am helping her load all of her stuff in a u haul and we are going on a road trip and driving all her stuff to Vancouver. I am so excited! I've never driven so far before. It is like an 18 hour drive or something.
I got new shoes, they are awesome. Osiris
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Shambhala 2011 [Aug. 8th, 2011|07:34 am]
Datsik, Samples, Excision, Ill Gates, Glitchy And Scratchy, Mat The Alien, Subvert, Dub FX, Bassnectar, and Skrillex! Shambhala 2011 = yes

Shambhala road trip. Aug 2 2011. 10 am. So now is the moment which maus and I embark on our epic journey to salmo, British Columbia. The sun is blazing already and we've got the t roof tops down on his Nissan pulsar. We are officially semi-hobos for a week. We did some last minute grocery shopping and withdrew some money for the early bird admission fee. It is cramped in here; I am sitting cross legged with a pillow in front of me. One more stop before we are on the road for good : visiting mauses mom to say goodbye. 
I wanted to make sure I got a very sound sleep the night before, but that didn't happen. I also made sure we didn't forget our shamhala tickets. Steev was awesome and picked me up from my house, we spent the night at his place, then he dropped me off at mauses in the morning before he went to work. This week is going to SUCK without him.
On the bright side I have been looking forward to this trip all year. I am uber stoked to go with maus this year too. EvenuLly I am thinking Burning man next year. Skrillex is fucking going to be there!
The t roof tops are packed under everything but we have a tarp to put over the car tonight if it rains. We are going to sleep in the car ( somehow) or on the hood or on the ground, at the gates   because they don't open them until tomorrow morning. Ended up making that pit stop at mauses parents new place that they moved in. It started drizzling which I worried about but maus said it'll pass soon. He was right. 
We got to hear murrays rants about how the system is so corrupt, legal loopholes, etc. Definitely always gives me a lot to think about. Afterwards they proceeded to give us a tour of the new place.
The house was very roomy older building, with a lot of land and buildings/sheds/barns. So much space to do projects, work on cars, etc. One of the upstairs ppl are gunna turn one of the sheds into a work out space. They are going to get chickens too! There are oldskool pigpens and even an old barrel that seems relatively intact. There is a huge unkempt garden which will be redone, as well as a pond and a creek. The only downfall is it is in the middle of assfuck nowhere. Boonies! 
6:00 pm we are in Osoyoos now and we stopped at a mcdonalds for grub. and free wifi. We are seeing so many hippies in these small towns. Dreads, neutral colors. We are not much better, although throw some obnoxious fluorescent colors into the mix. I get such a kick out of the funny looks we are getting from the small town folk tho. I am excited for all therandom stuff we are going to put in our dreads. We brougt floatation devices for the river too! We also put an Awesomeface.jpeg flag and pirate flag on the nissan. Got compliments on our hair from a quebecer that was road tripping. Read snuff by chuck palahniuk. Listened to prodigy, datsik, excision, and deltron 3030. I love that Run with The Wolves song on the Invaders Must Die album. Also went through spme of the the jay and silent bob podcast on the way. It just got super warm and beautiful out; blue skies all around. Almost used all of our sunscreen already lol. Kootany mountainside is seriously a glorious sight. 
Maus said he reckons we are some of the most obvious looking shambhala-attendees on the road. People drive by us and yell SHAMBHALAaaaaa!
8:30 pm we just left Grand Forks (epic utensils ) and we are on our way to Castlegar. there were deer EVERYWHERE in the last town, in peoples yards and stuff. I saw like 20. we saw the aftermath of a baby deer that got hit by a car. And a roadkill skunk. We stopped for more sunscreen and candy and ran into some more sham peoples who told us we will see them at the gates and gave us some info about staying outside of the gates before they open them at 8am tomorrow. The sham people had a van and they were selling feather earrings! We blasted skrillex, skindred, polysics, deadmau5. 
10:30 omg omg omg we are in the shambhala line up. We ran into our van friends and they are right behind us blasting trippy music. I am so excited for the bass and the stars are ridiculously prominent in these skies. I am getting antsy!! But we made it. And we made it in one go. Hooray for roughing it. Hotels are overpriced to shit. 
4:54 am I officially hate psytrance because that is the genre that the dj was spinning for majority of the night while we were trying to sleep. Thank fuck for earplugs. It is super chilly with the t tops still not intact, but I have a fuzzy blanket and a big hoodie so I am sufficing. People were dancing on top of their vehicles. Really blown speakers playing that sex and candy song = nostalgic. Maus and I are listening to all of the snippets of stupid commentary and high conversations. 3 more hours! 

12:30 noon august 3.  We are currently waiting in line to actually get in, although the car already got searched. I am chilling, actually no I lied; quite the opposite of chilling ~ in the Nissan with a tarp over it for shade and one of those tiny hand held battery operated fans. We are in row four. I got a pretty good sleep despite being semi curled up and weirdly contorted in the car. I bought a peacock feather earring from the feather van people. It is sweltering and all I can think of is how refreshing the river is going to be after we finally set up camp. I saw the most beat up rusty geo metro convertible and I told the driver I loved his car. It was a similar faded yellow color to steevs crx and it made me super happy.
1:00 pm on the way back from the washroom I look down and find a baggy with some ketamine in it. I gave it to maus, dont trust myself with it lol.
August 6 1230 pm
We went to the drug testing booth and got the k tested. Turned out t was mostly k with a possibility of a little bit of speed. I heard VENESSA being yelled at our campground dome set up, but I didn't think it was for me because nobody ever cals me that. Turns out it was Gina Matt and Gidget in their blue bus! They made it. They gave me a tour of the bus, which they are going to call "the pig". They picked up some rand hitchhikers along the way. They had already dropped them off though. I did end up meeting a girl named Jacklyn whom I call Jack for short. I watched everybody do lines of blow. 
We bumped into Matt and Gina later on that day; they stopped by the dome and they were high on acid and we talked. Two more people hey knew walked by the dome so Gina said hey and they came and chilled for a bit.
We decided to check out the other dome. Some guy saw us putting up our dome and he said they had one of those too and we should swing by and visit. So we did and it's epic: it's structural steel so it's extremely solid, and there is a top level near the top constructed out of rope . A rope ladder leads up to it and it has another 8 hammocks hung up in it and two swingy hammock chairs. I was chilling in a dome with new people I met and Matt and Gina and maus swinging in a chair swing. We chilled on top of the dome for a bit too. 
Being around my friends who were high on acid was making me giddy.
I experienced the awesomeness of checking out some of the stages last night. Mat the Alien at the Fractal Forest. Wow that blew me away. We danced our way into right by the speaker and the bass was so intense i could feel it on the hairs of my arms. My ears felt like they broke. There was a guy in an orange spandex suit with a super soaker shooting it into the crowd. He got bitched at by security shortly after. As did the people smoking joints while dancing on the speakers. 
I'll gates was pretty funky too, they did a mix of chefs chocolate salty balls song..
Finally, we bumped into jack and her friend Alex and when ill gates finished his set we booted it over to the Village. Jack and Alex and gidge and I all went together. Datsik fucking annihilated it. So damn good. I love seeing the crowds enthusiasm. Also the random beach balls being tosses around. Asian guy comes up to me with a big grin on his face and says "herro". 
12 noon august 7
Saw samples knight riders and excision last night. Totally just saw Datsik riding an ATv. I realized last night that I have a major advantage : I am not high as balls. We learned that if we keep our eyes peeled we can find stuf on the ground. A joint, soap, flip flops, a pin, a blanket, bandanna etc. It may not seem like much but when you are filthy as fuck, and they are charging 5 bux for soap and 5 bux for 5 mins of showering, these things are gold. I am chilling underneath this massive shady area . A bunch of people are napping here, some on blankets others on inflatable mattresses. It's so nice here, I feel a bit crazy from too much sun and it is too hot in the dome to sleep. I bought a Datsik sticker just now. And so far we've had smoothies, a chicken ranch wrap, and a donair. Their frozen yogurt is good too. 7 bux tho. I yearn for three things: electricity, wifi, and a normal mirror to do my make up with. I've been using mauses rear view mirror and harddrive disks as mirrors. I broke my sunglasses, boo. I found another pair though.

Just saw a "you're doing it wrong" shirt.
10:30 pm august 7.
In the glitchy and scratchy dance floor a random dude gave me a lollipop. There were people just handing out candy too.

Last night here. That 5 hour nap during the day was amazing. Bumped into Matt Gina and gidget (they knocked on the car window and said ThIS iS THE POLICE haha. Walking back to the car a person was yelling someones name trying to find them, then a bunch of people started yelling random names for the fuck of it. There is a ferris wheel here. We had one last feast as a group in the dome: grilled cheese sandwiches, pasta, tuna peppers and pesto on a pita, instant mashed potatos, juice and peanut butter covered crackers. And coffee made with milk powder and a shit ton of sugar packets we snagged from the coffee stand. Afterwards we (5 people) took down the dome and it only took 45 minutes. Ack I'm missing subvert but I need to piss and the line up for the porta-potties is massive. Maus decided to take a nap in the car because he was sleep deprived all day and we need energy for bassnectar skrillex flux pavilion dub fx and doctor p. I hope I bump into maus; he has my monster. :p
Such sick costumes here! Dhenebdbfjd
Get Datsik sticker and memory card and subwoofer off of maus.
We are hoping to leave at like 4am ish. We will see if we have enough energy. catching the last bit of subvert.
Someone said " you're the girl in the blue dome!" so amusing that she recogniZed me.
Bassnectar coming on/
Omg fungineers are on stage rapping while dub fx is beatboxing! Blowup doll in crowd being tossed around like a beach ball. People are sillystringing from the catwalk at The Village.
Skrillex was amazing.3 30 am Monday aug 8 . We figured we should leave now. Get a head start on going home. Vancouver here we come.
I'm going to miss the random people poking their heads in our dome home just to say hi and chit chat. I'm also going to miss the stars. And the epic bass. Power up the bass canon. Goodbye shambhala. See you again next year.
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<3 [Jul. 7th, 2011|07:01 pm]

I could watch you for a lifetime
You’re my favourite movie
A thousand endings
You mean everything to me
I never know what’s coming
Forever fascinated
Hope you don’t stop running
To me cause I’ll always be waiting

You are A cinema I could watch you forever
Action Thriller I could watch you forever
You are A Cinema A Hollywood treasure
Love you Just the way you are
A Cinema A Cinema A Cinema
A Cinema A Cinema A Cinema

Stars spell out your name
Like in a science fiction drama
Romance roll in
Like a flower in the summer
You always keep me guessing
Forever my wonder
Hope you start undressing
All my dreams until the end of
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need some oil for my mechanical brain system [Jun. 10th, 2011|03:23 pm]
‎2 energy drinks and a green tea latte later.. I AM CORNHOLIO!!!
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(no subject) [Jan. 19th, 2011|07:48 pm]
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(no subject) [Jan. 18th, 2011|11:18 pm]
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(no subject) [Jan. 3rd, 2011|08:58 pm]
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(no subject) [Nov. 7th, 2010|05:03 pm]
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(no subject) [Nov. 5th, 2010|12:59 am]
she didnt want a party hat, i got hissed at
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(no subject) [Oct. 12th, 2010|05:00 pm]
My headphones broke, they keep cutting in and ou7t, something to do with the chord
i couldnt find my receipt so i bought a new pair, swapped it with my broken ones, and then returned it and got my money back.

I'm pleased with how easy that was!

i didn't have to spend an extra 80 bucks

Die Antwoord :DCollapse ) TONIGHT@! Valyce was rad and bought me ticket online which i am paying her back for. I just worked a 4 hour janitor shift, it was pretty chill and they were thankful i came in on such short notice

nothign new, but ithink tonight is going to be 'fOKKEN' WICKED!
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(no subject) [Oct. 1st, 2010|02:21 am]
Ate pigeon for the first time today, thanks Mouse for that
I locked my keys in my car AGAIN! the second time in two months! i really need to get my spare.
‎*ven was jamming a coat hanger in her car* *cop drives by a few minutes later* "Were you just trying to slim jim that car?" ven:"Yeah, its my car though"

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(no subject) [Sep. 22nd, 2010|04:26 pm]
I went for a bike ride todfay for the first time in a very long time and it was beautifullll
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(no subject) [Sep. 17th, 2010|05:27 am]
Working at 6 AM today XD

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(no subject) [Sep. 8th, 2010|01:15 pm]
Me Mouse Jaime Steve Edmo Mike and Valyce all watched Machete. it was seriously one of the best movies ever. Afterwards Me Steve Mouse Edmo chilled in the Metrotown parking lot listening to music and feeding rats until like 2 AM. AHHAHAA
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(no subject) [Sep. 7th, 2010|01:56 am]

UPDate: Passed my Class 5 Road test!!!!
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(no subject) [Aug. 31st, 2010|03:17 pm]
My mom and sister just made the best salmon sushi. And my mom brought it to me with green tea. So delicious

Im really excited for camping.
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(no subject) [Aug. 25th, 2010|12:06 pm]
"there once was a time
and the time knew no bounds
because while it was one of the briefest of moments
it seemed to last forever

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(no subject) [Aug. 23rd, 2010|12:43 am]
"we can recover from valyces party with tea and coffee and energy drinks and faxanadu"
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(no subject) [Aug. 22nd, 2010|06:05 pm]
Zombie walk was wicked. we all looked rad.

A weird paranormal activity happened at Mikes apartment. power was completely out in a large part of vancouver. we were all chilling in the dark in mikes apartment and then Gidget said soemthing like "SPIRITS MAKE YOUR PRESENCE KNOWN!" and a light flashed, we're thinking maybe from the computer or something, and the modem started beeping. but it was like right after she said it. it was freaky. Very bizarre coincidence .
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(no subject) [Aug. 1st, 2010|10:18 pm]
Soooooooo exccited for Shambhala you have no idea!

i feel better lately
im gona apply at lordco when i return, and take my dreads out!
i got a clean drivers abstract and i know stick, i know ill get it

i just listened to this 119 minute compilation of glitch hop and dubstep... AHHH I CANT WAIT FOR ALLL THE DUBSTEP AT SHAM! And Bassnectar! Yes

Ive been artsy lately, i am making shitloads of bracelets and sewing and i painted these sunglasses rainbow, they look sweet
I hung out with my old friend Eivi a few days ago, and it was a breath of fresh air seeing her. we are going to wreck beach tmrw.
she gave me 2 dreads, swirly blue and pink ones, as a gift and they are in my hair now. also she gave me some art from PUFF (smoke shop) which i colored with UV reactive paint and looks wicked./ i donated to Miek's apartment/

then on tuesday morning i leave for ROAD TRIP! Aug 4th to the 9th or 10th. I can't wait to hit the road

Ive been trying to clear my head and just like, reflect on things lately (and being sober really helps me realize some shit) .. yes Ive been chilling at parties sober, its weird. but i need it. im not in the right state of mind to do mind altering shit. i figure i need to face this full on. but i realized that i dont need to drink or trip mad balls to be part of a party. it helps to have an energy drink in hand though =P

I have an appointment with my employment counselor in a week
tattoo appointment to finish myu chocobo HUZZAH!
drivers test
And im leaning towards auto body at bcit.

i had a good conversation with curt last night. i am so thankful to even hear his voice again. for awhile i didnt think i would other than to exchange belongings...

heres some recentish pics i guess! uv paint yay! among other shit
:3Collapse )
OH YEAH JAIMES NEW PLACE is soooooooooo cute. its a tiny turquoise house, and her bachelorette suite is purple! and its like a little hippy place. sooo unique and awesome.
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(no subject) [Jul. 26th, 2010|05:57 pm]
Had an amazing weekend with some fucking amazing people.

Valyce is getting her hair did today, i can't wait to see it.

I love how we've done this for like 4 weekends in a row, but the crew would hang out the whole weekend straight and just do fun things.

Black light + UV reactive paint = fun times
Playland + fireworks
+ lots of movies
and parks and downtown
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